5 ways to improve your social life even if you can’t actually socialise

fethr
3 min readAug 18, 2021

So, it’s more difficult to meet people at the moment. If you’re in the UK, it’s literally illegal.

But don’t let that stop you from improving your social life. Time spent reflecting on your personal wellbeing, contemplating what you look for in your friendships, is not time wasted.

There’s plenty you can do from home. In the spirit of rich and rewarding future relationships, and future regeneration after a fallow year for socialising, here are 5 suggestions to help you breathe, take stock, and remember that socialising starts with you.

Love yourself

You can only be authentic when you are comfortable in your own skin. Pursue self-love to the ends of the earth. Be unapologetic about it.

Easier said than done? Building truly indestructible self-esteem takes work. But step-by-step, with good habits, you make progress.

Experiment to find what works best for you. It could be rewarding yourself for small wins and achievements. It could be practicing positive self-talk, championing yourself and all your amazing qualities every day in front of the mirror.

Remember that what you see as shortcomings likely look like tallcomings from where your friend is standing. You’re pretty great, in all your weird and wonderful glory. Don’t go forgetting it.

Set your expectations

Make your future social life intentional rather than automatic. An emptier social calendar provides some much needed critical distance. Take the time to ponder what it is you actually want from your friendships.

Maybe you realise that your social high points come from the camaraderie of collaborating on a common goal. Perhaps it dawns on you that you enjoy yourself most when the group size is under six people.

A little more painful, you might realise that a few of your friendships are too one-sided and not worth future investment. You might realise that you’re erecting emotional barriers that will need tearing down if you’re after deep and meaningful social connection.

Devise a strategy for overcoming your social limitations

After you’ve worked out what you want to seek out and what you want to avoid, be prepared to battle the ingrained patterns of behaviour which currently govern your social life. To throw off the restrictions holding you back from making amazing connections, you’ll have to obliterate any negative thoughts and emotions.

For example, if you often feel anxious about meeting new people, now is a good time to think of ways to push yourself outside that dreaded comfort zone.

You could journal about your worries. Where do they stem from? Are they realistic? On paper, in the cold light of day, they won’t look quite so formidable.

Give mindfulness a go. Studies show that meditation reduces stress and anxiety, leaving you free to squeeze every last drop from what life has to offer.

Appreciate the good times that have come before

We may have taken our social lives for granted in the past. We won’t after this pandemic.

For now, appreciate highlights from years gone by. There’s deep pleasure in looking at old photos, writing down favourite memories. If old friends crop up in your reminiscences, get back in touch. You can meet again in person down the line.

Look forward to getting going again

Get pumped to meet people again. Before you know it, you’ll be back out there. So map out future trips. Plan with friends. Sign up to fethr.app. Anticipation is half the fun.

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fethr

We're reimagining the way we meet new people, by using the best of tech to accelerate – not replace – meaningful social connection.